My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize