To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
Randomize