So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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