My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
