he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Oh god it's open bar.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
Randomize
