whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
