You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Randomize
