lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
