Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
