it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
