We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
