we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize