One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
