I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
