I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize