somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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