You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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