i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
