My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Randomize
