So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize
