u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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