i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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