The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
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