I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Randomize