what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
