his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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