she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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