I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
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