Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
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