We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
