I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
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