Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
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