doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
We're like a lot better than the average bears
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
This baby is an asshole
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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