There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I think my vagina is haunted
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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