No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Randomize