Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
