Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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