Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Randomize
