Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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