Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Randomize