Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
