SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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