I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
