SEEEEXXX PLEASE
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Randomize
