remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
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