Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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