well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
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