we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
