Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Randomize
