So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Be still, my beating vagina.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Randomize